The Need to be Needed: One example of white knighting?
When I was working at Super 8, we were in the middle of a shift change when a woman came to the front desk to complain about something. Since I was on my way out, my coworker, a woman who had worked at the hotel for at least two years and provided some of my training, took the complaint.
As I was finishing some paperwork, the complainer explained that she was better educated than my coworker, and so the complainer knew what needed to be done and my coworker needed to just follow her instructions. Those instructions were contrary to corporate policy and could have gotten my coworker fired, but the complainer continued to wield her education like a weapon to beat my coworker into submission.
Rather than allow this to continue, I stepped up to the window, told my coworker that I would take care of the problem and told the complainer that I had a degree from Linfield. I had just graduated, but it was enough to get the woman who was complaining to back off and accept what we could do according to corporate policy.
From my perspective, I was protecting a teammate from an unfair and unwarranted verbal attack on something that my coworker had no control over. After telling this story a couple of times, I got a different perspective on the entire situation. One perspective says that I could have been wielding my white male privilege against the woman who was complaining.
Another perspective says that I was taking power away from my coworker that she should have and could have wielded if I were not there. In essence, I was coming in as the white knight to rescue the damsel in distress without her consent, without her asking and with only her acquiescence that may have been a result of my being male.
She had more experience in the hotel business than I had. She was perfectly capable of dealing with the situation, and maybe I should have let her do so. In that moment, however, I felt like I was needed because it is my job as a teammate to help when another teammate is in trouble. The problem is that in that moment I may have also devalued and oppressed my coworker without meaning to.
As I was finishing some paperwork, the complainer explained that she was better educated than my coworker, and so the complainer knew what needed to be done and my coworker needed to just follow her instructions. Those instructions were contrary to corporate policy and could have gotten my coworker fired, but the complainer continued to wield her education like a weapon to beat my coworker into submission.
Rather than allow this to continue, I stepped up to the window, told my coworker that I would take care of the problem and told the complainer that I had a degree from Linfield. I had just graduated, but it was enough to get the woman who was complaining to back off and accept what we could do according to corporate policy.
From my perspective, I was protecting a teammate from an unfair and unwarranted verbal attack on something that my coworker had no control over. After telling this story a couple of times, I got a different perspective on the entire situation. One perspective says that I could have been wielding my white male privilege against the woman who was complaining.
Another perspective says that I was taking power away from my coworker that she should have and could have wielded if I were not there. In essence, I was coming in as the white knight to rescue the damsel in distress without her consent, without her asking and with only her acquiescence that may have been a result of my being male.
She had more experience in the hotel business than I had. She was perfectly capable of dealing with the situation, and maybe I should have let her do so. In that moment, however, I felt like I was needed because it is my job as a teammate to help when another teammate is in trouble. The problem is that in that moment I may have also devalued and oppressed my coworker without meaning to.