Death of a son:
Guilt and 'lack' of delusion in the gun argument
On July 3, 2016, a father took three of his children to a shooting range to practice shooting. In a stupid, stupid accident in the safest place that guns could ever be used, the father shot and killed his 14-year old boy. The family was well-versed in guns, but in one moment of inattention, a life, full of promise, joy and talent, was taken.
Buying into the NRA mentality, the father said (according to CNN), “The gun didn’t kill my boy. I did.” While the father, Clayton Brumby seems to be able to use his faith in God to come out a little better than most of us would, it seems a terrible shame that he has to take on all of the guilt from the death of his child because of a false dichotomy that everyone in the United States has bought into.
Guns don’t kill people. People kill people. That isn’t exactly true. If you want to split hairs, guns don’t kill people, bullets kill people. But guns are an instrument of death. They are a partner in, or at the very least an accessory to, the deaths that they cause. Without people, guns are useless (unless they are hooked up to a computer programmed to fire at anything that moves). Without bullets, guns are much less effective. So the real phrase should be “People with guns, sometimes, kill other people and/or themselves.” It isn’t that catchy, so it probably won’t become a part of the culture. In the U.S., it happens a lot more than in other developed countries, but the real point isn’t even about whether or not people should have guns. In this instance, the gun, in the hands of the father, was the instrument of the son’s death.
The point is that this father has had his ability to rationalize and defer some of his guilt in the death of his child. He has been robbed of what might be mankind’s greatest gift and greatest curse: he has been robbed of his ability to use self-delusion.
People are able to convince themselves of any number of things to help them live better lives. Global warming isn’t man made. The moon landing never happened. The Earth is flat. Justin Bieber is a great singer. There is no end to the things that people tell themselves, both good and bad, that just aren’t true. However, as long as it supports their world view, there is generally no harm in it. And sometimes, maintaining an identity requires more self-delusion than anyone is willing to admit. Life and the unvarnished truth are tough enough without some sort of delusion.
When parents can blame a hot car, an alligator or an open well, things may be just a bit easier to bear, even though losing a child is the toughest thing any parent has to go through. In the end, it sounds like Clayton Brumby will be able to deal with his guilt and grief. His faith and his seemingly good grasp of his truth should help him through the tragedy. I can’t help but feel that for others, this type of event would have drastic life-altering consequences that, without the ability to share the guilt with the instrument of death, would be unbearable.
Buying into the NRA mentality, the father said (according to CNN), “The gun didn’t kill my boy. I did.” While the father, Clayton Brumby seems to be able to use his faith in God to come out a little better than most of us would, it seems a terrible shame that he has to take on all of the guilt from the death of his child because of a false dichotomy that everyone in the United States has bought into.
Guns don’t kill people. People kill people. That isn’t exactly true. If you want to split hairs, guns don’t kill people, bullets kill people. But guns are an instrument of death. They are a partner in, or at the very least an accessory to, the deaths that they cause. Without people, guns are useless (unless they are hooked up to a computer programmed to fire at anything that moves). Without bullets, guns are much less effective. So the real phrase should be “People with guns, sometimes, kill other people and/or themselves.” It isn’t that catchy, so it probably won’t become a part of the culture. In the U.S., it happens a lot more than in other developed countries, but the real point isn’t even about whether or not people should have guns. In this instance, the gun, in the hands of the father, was the instrument of the son’s death.
The point is that this father has had his ability to rationalize and defer some of his guilt in the death of his child. He has been robbed of what might be mankind’s greatest gift and greatest curse: he has been robbed of his ability to use self-delusion.
People are able to convince themselves of any number of things to help them live better lives. Global warming isn’t man made. The moon landing never happened. The Earth is flat. Justin Bieber is a great singer. There is no end to the things that people tell themselves, both good and bad, that just aren’t true. However, as long as it supports their world view, there is generally no harm in it. And sometimes, maintaining an identity requires more self-delusion than anyone is willing to admit. Life and the unvarnished truth are tough enough without some sort of delusion.
When parents can blame a hot car, an alligator or an open well, things may be just a bit easier to bear, even though losing a child is the toughest thing any parent has to go through. In the end, it sounds like Clayton Brumby will be able to deal with his guilt and grief. His faith and his seemingly good grasp of his truth should help him through the tragedy. I can’t help but feel that for others, this type of event would have drastic life-altering consequences that, without the ability to share the guilt with the instrument of death, would be unbearable.