My mom and I have been having the discussion about gray for at least three decades. She sees things in varying shades of gray. The lighter shades are more correct, the darker shades less correct.
I believe that things are right or wrong, or they do not matter. You choose to do the right thing, or you choose to do the wrong thing and you must accept the consequences of your choices without whining about whether or not something is fair.
When I have this discussion about morals with other people, they will often revert to the Les Miserables argument. Jean Valjean stole bread to feed his family. Is this wrong? The answer is clearly “yes.” Stealing is wrong, and Jean Valjean paid for stealing – a steep and unjust penalty to be sure.
The other side of the question is a system that allows people to go hungry wrong? Again, the answer is “yes.” Human rights should include adequate food, clothing, health care, shelter and education for everyone. However, the large scale wrong does not make the small scale wrong right.
I admit that if my family were starving and stealing was the only way I could feed them. I would steal, but their hunger does not make stealing right. It just makes it necessary.
I understand the need for forgiveness and mercy in a society. I understand that human needs can and should be met by a nation that is able to produce so much and that is controlled by so few. I understand that there are those who will take advantage of the system, as there are people who take advantage of every system.
None of that should matter when a person needs to decide what is right or wrong, and the criteria are easy to set. Whether it is the Golden Rule (do unto others as you would have them do unto you), which can only work in a society where people do not enjoy pain, Asimov’s Three Laws of Robotics, or another religion’s basic tenet – and all religions have the same basic tenet – people need to treat each other with respect and love.
When that happens, people will not have to justify wrongdoings that harm others through the use of graywash; instead, they will be able to choose the right actions for themselves without harming others through those decisions.